Sleepless Night

So much changes have gone through that I'm getting this "I am female" awareness more and more.

I get myself feminine outfit during shopping.

I did more beauty care and check on mirror more often.

I take attention on my posture.

I care about how I look and wanted to work out for body shaping.

Apart of that, at this moment and this late hour, I am thinking if I could have someone hug me to sleep, or make love to me.

I supposed I am getting tired of living independently and desire for one who can let me lean on, sharing my joy and sorrow.

Sadly I also know that there isn't a right guy yet. The right one that would make me crazy after him. Afterall I am very aware that it is not easy for me to develop feeling for a person. I am always too calm, too rational, close to heartless.

Tough week that I had

Dear Blog

29th July: Got myself into a long session of argument with best buddy while busy with my works in customer site. Never an easy job to troubleshoot machines while handle people issues (him and clients). Heavy rain poured down forced us to stay in house and skipped lunch on that day, starved to hell. Just when I thought this is bad enough yet fate decided to leave me no mercy as one of the car drove through water pool on roadside and I ended up half wet during my way. And the fight with best buddy ended with no ending, I'm way too tired to deal with it anymore. #whydothistome

30th July: Sick symptom kicks in. Stay in office to finished up some other in house stuff whereas I need to get my mind clear off slightly. Took in some Vitamin C and praying super hard that I can get better on next morning day.

31st July: Officially man down. A little too late to rely on Vitamin C on this moment and I just have to visit Watson again to get a flu medicine this time #Ihatetobesick.

1st Aug: At least I'm getting good stuff today that my condition is getting well. And managed to find a working solution for a long pending task which I had tossed aside for a while. #thankgod

Verdict: When the confrontation came on me, I was thinking "not again..." since this is not the first time it is happen. It kinda make me start to think, perhaps we do have different expectations there and he did proved me wrong for thinking that he is one of the person that would have understand me more than anyone else. I was wrong, no one would... and I accepted it.

Signing off.