New Year

Had been making plans with different parties which I foresee I will become busier for 2013.

• Linux exam in Feb, with WL.
• Taiwain trip in Aug, with Ang and WH.
• Scuba Diving, so I can visit Cynn who stay in Labuan.
  

These are main targets that I wish to fulfill in new year. Regardless, I too have some other targets and plans that I had make with other comrade too.

• Game development with Stephen.
• Cycling with mum.
• Hiking with AJ. 
• Swimming.
• Drumming.
  

Oh, not to forget I adopt a dollfie and I suppose I will have to do more photo shooting. I will soon get my hand on the doll at Feb when K is dropping by. And I also promised to bring him around during his vacation somewhere in Sept. 

A good start for the new year that I have so many to-do but apparently it doesn't look like I can complete all the above. So, one gentle reminder to myself that I should enjoy and get to learn a lot during the process, and less visualize about the outcome. It is alright to not finish it, because I can always come back to it, that I know it's true. Happy New Year! Wish everyone have a great year and achieve more than the past :D 

P/S: The most precious lesson I had learnt was to realize that I'm not alone :) It is good to have fighters with you and we move forward together, give each other a push when needed. 

Expectation "X"

Random fact strikes me today and I must write down for my own reminder.

"ASK for what you desired, ASK for the things you have wanted.
NO expectation as no one is suppose to help you if you don't ASK for it."

And I need to stop thinking I am fine with it and kept quiet. Because I am not, and yet I don't ask.

Personal Entertainment

Some days ago, I have decided to get a new PS3 console and rearrange my setup since the old TV was taken away for sister new wedded home.However they agreed to get me a new LCD TV as replacement for the old one and thus, this is what I got for the sweet free replace, 32" Samsung 4 series LCD TV.

New toy! Final Fantasy XIII-2 Limited Edition PS3 Bundle :)

The goodies come along with bundle. Game, Original Soundtrack and Serah's poster.

Lightning san with cool armor (≧∇≦)/

Somehow, I ran into trouble when trying to put up the setup as Samsung is so stingy and only give 2 HDMI port, 1 composite input and 0 audio output (WTF!!). 

No audio output, STINGY!（x_x；）

Since I need to put up the DVD player for my father sake as he shared the setup with me, that means I have to give up on my PS2 and it has to go to the storage for now /sigh. Beside that, with the lack of audio output, it took me awhile to squeeze my brain juice for other ways to route the audio signal from PS3 and DVD player to my old Altec Lancing 2.1 speaker since I'm going to utilize the speaker better sound quality instead of listening to the crappy TV audio. Luckily, I was able to solved this with the use of several extension cable, RCA-RCA cable, RCA-Stereo adapter and get it route completely to my speaker. 

Up and green to go!

Now I can play the game and enjoy the Full HD playback quality whenever I'm coming back, SWEEEEET (⌒▽⌒)☆

Change of Routine

It's started :)

I have a few advice that I would like to give to myself.

- Absorb as much as possible and utilized it well.

- Never be the follower but the decision maker.

- Make your choice wisely and think through.

- ENJOY the new living.

Next up, I will need to draft a plan and put down most of the things that I would like to fulfill. With much details required of course. Keep it up!

2011 Concluded

Determined and decided to write a post to concluded my last year and what I had achieved during the whole year on 2011. Here goes with:

1. Improved on dancing skills.

2. Gained confidence and does not give up on dancing.

3. More reading. Be it self-improvement or fictions.

4. Took up new ideas and challenges. Applied at work and help out for friend's part time.

5. Made new friends and improved on social relationship.

6. Made it to AFA (Anime Festival Asia) in Singapore. (Wish comes true)

7. Wore white dress. (Not really a good experience and I dislike it still -_-")

8. Talking with Waran again.

Overall it was a good year for me that I managed to experience a few things. And now, I have to start thinking and planning for new year and bid Goodbye to 2011.

Perhaps, I shall start it with this simple-yet-hard-to-achieve new resolution for 2012.

1. Sleep early and make enough rest.

2. Define myself.

Let work hard together, 2012!

Hero

I remember a story that I had read from somewhere, regarding a little girl who told her parent that she would prefer to be the person giving applause and claps for hero, instead of becoming a hero herself. The story touched me in a point.

I have been thinking sometime, who and what I actually hope and wish to be. I always try very hard to become a hero and most of the time, it doesn't turn out to be what I have expected and there are time, it turns out to be hilarious and epic fail. I have been asking myself

"Do I really want to be a hero"

Or was it because everyone around me think that being a hero is the only right thing to do in the world. And I was trying too hard for it, to become a hero for other people.

I admire the little girl, simply because she was able to see things in another side of view. A hero is created out from applauses and praises by people. Without those, they are nobody to anyone. When they are nobody, they will be trying hard to be "somebody" just like everyone did.

Life is our own path. It is fine to choose our own path and our own pace to walk it till the end. You make the decision to become "somebody" or "nobody", and neither is wrong. Just got to admit that too many people trying to be a hero and it has more than enough.

Depression

I'm supposed to be asleep by this hour. However my mind has been swirling in this abyss called "Depression"

Yes, I'm very depressing at the moment, regarding how I know my mind has been playing a trick on me with all the negative thoughts, low esteem and the fact that I haven't been doing anything productive. It is like there is a lock on my so called talent or potential you may call it, which has been limiting my own growth and sealing my potential in a tiny little box.

I can't seem to recall why or when is this happened, or am I the one lock it away when I was trying to throw away my naiveness while growing up to be a decent adult. I have realized that I'm probably the one who put up this lock and I need to remove it in order to grow more than what I am now. But it doesn't work out as I thought it should *ARGH!!* It looks like to remove a lock is harder than you lock it up *tear* Or perhaps, I just din't try hard enough *damn it*

Now that I'm letting out all of this by writing this post, releasing myself for just a bit. So that when I wake up tomorrow morning, I'm going to tell myself "A Good Day" and make my tempt to tear off the lock, even though it is going to take awhile. I just have to try harder and harder.

Talent, Potential, please wait for me. I'll be there soon enough to rescue you from this sealed box.